Tuesday, April 15, 2008

The Storm

Today was better than yesterday, so I'm grateful for that. The crazy mostly subsided for the day, but the back aches are now plaguing me. It alternates between sharp, stabbing pain and dull ache on either side. My first ultrasound while stimming is tomorrow morning. Can't wait to take a peek in there and see what's going on. Please let there be lots of follicles, a growing lining, and a not too high E2 level.

Tonight while I was driving home, it was really windy and the gusts were blowing sheets of dust through the air. I was listening to today's tune on the radio at full volume and I felt like I was pushing forward through a storm-physically and metaphorically. This storm of infertility. It is a struggle, but as long as I feel like I'm pushing forward, I'm okay. I thought about this while driving through the dust storm, listening to lyrics about not sinking the boat. There just has to be an end to the storm at some point. A sunny, calm end to the storm. And in the meantime, "breathe...it's all you can."

6 comments:

Natalie said...

I'm thinking good thoughts for you too my friend, hoping this works for both of us.

s.e. said...

I hope everything looks good tomorrow!

Your comment was very helpful tonight. Thank you! I had already finished it when I read your comment. But watching the online video was reassuring to know we did it right. (I think!) Ask your hubby for a backrub tonight and "breathe".

Melanie said...

Waiting anxiously to hear the good news, something like "pillow-like" lining and "mature, voluminous, consistently shaped and darn smart looking" follicles.

Shinejil said...

Keep breathing, Denise! You're making your way through this.

I hope today goes well.

Morgan said...

I hope you have great u/s results. Keep pushing forward.

Maria said...

Liked the song, perfect for how I'm feeling too.

I hope everything went well today!