Yesterday I found myself in front of that section of the greeting cards that infertiles hate. The baby section. Not to mention I was in the store where all the babies congregate (Target). B and I were picking out a new baby card for some friends of ours and it wasn't bad at all because we were actually happy for these friends. *I should edit that to add that B is always happy for whichever friend or family member gets pregnant. I, on the other hand, move quickly between happy, envious, angry, sad, and back again.
I picked up one card and was shocked to see these words "We're Expecting!" I had no idea they made cards for people to announce a pregnancy. I guess it makes sense because most normal people get to announce a pregnancy in some fashion to the family and friends with nothing but excitement and maybe a little nervousness. This is something that being infertile robs you of. Even when you do achieve that blessed state of pregnancy, you're always waiting for the other shoe to drop. Waiting to be told it was a mistake, just kidding, waiting for something to go wrong. After all, nothing has been easy in this process, so why should that change?
I admit that I don't know this from experience, but rather from my fellow bloggers who have actually been there. But I can understand how this happens. Because even when a cycle seems to be going as smooth as can be, you are still wondering what will go wrong next. I just can't imagine finally getting pregnant and being willing to jinx it all by sending out an announcement. On paper! Superstitious much?
Here is an update on the peace lily, the flower is actually starting to open: