Friday, June 27, 2008

Belly Shot Below

Thanks to everyone for your comments on my last post. It is good to know that my support system is still intact even though I feel guilty for whining (and, Nancy, if you could hear me in person, yes, it sure sounds like whining!). But I guess I am starting to be okay with things and know that I'm entitled to whine a bit when I feel it's necessary.

You might have noticed that I now have two different baby widgets on my sidebar. I added the new one because it allows for twins, but I didn't want to get rid of the first one because I like the functionality of being able to click on the week and read about what should be going on in there for that week.

This week was very similar to last week. Monday and Tuesday were horrible, horrible, long days of feeling awful all day long and then lying in bed moaning all evening. Things got a bit better as the week went on and today I almost felt completely normal for about an hour in the morning. I'm so glad the weekend is here so I can lie around all day without having to move other than to pee and eat. I think I've finally found the right dose and frequency of col.ace that makes the constipation bearable, so that is good progress.

I'm still taking the zo.fran (hence the horrible constipation). To be honest, it doesn't seem to do much of anything for the nausea, but I haven't vomited since I started taking it (knocking fiercely on wood). That isn't to say I haven't come close at times. Very close. But at least I've been able to keep some food down. And last night, I actually wanted AND enjoyed eating dinner. That hasn't happened in a long time. I am thankful that my insurance covers the stuff as it is really expensive ($27 per pill and I take 3 per day). At least I'm getting something out of my health insurance, even if they wouldn't pay for a cent of any of my IUI's or IVF's.

I've also rediscovered my sweet tooth with a vengeance. Probably not the best thing, but all I've wanted lately is donuts, ding dongs, and chocolate in any form. I haven't had a ding dong in so many years and I have no idea what made me think of them, but I mentioned it last night and when I got home from work today, ding dongs had magically appeared on the kitchen counter. Of course, the magic was B going to the store this morning (for the 500th time in the past 2 months). I also now have a supply of donut holes, cupcakes, in addition to my standard fruit that I've been living on lately (grapes, watermelon, bananas, and peaches, plus the new addition of grapefruits which sounded good last night too).

Now that I think about it, I'm definitely feeling better now (at least at this moment) because it isn't making me feel sick to talk/write/think about food. What a relief! That isn't to say I don't still have my dark moments where I feel like I'm about to die, but at least there is SOME relief from the constant doom and gloom. I'm starting to have short periods of time where I actually feel like reading my pregnancy books or looking at baby stuff online. Progress. Or baby steps, so to speak. I don't know if it is from the zo.fran and it took awhile to build up enough constant supply in my system, or if I'm starting to feel a bit better because I'm nearing the second trimester. I really hope it is the latter.

My next OB appointment is next Wednesday and this time I'll actually get to see my OB and hear the babies' heartbeats (I hope). It will have been 4 weeks since our last ultrasound which seems like a lifetime to me. I'm really hoping we'll get another peek at the buns next week so I'll feel like everything's still on track. I guess the experiences we've had in the past 2+ years have just made it difficult for me to believe that things will go smoothly. Part of me is still waiting for the other shoe to drop, but I'm trying not to think about that too often.

I'm also curious if she'll start measuring me and if she'll tell me how far along I'm measuring. It's a little ridiculous to me that it is difficult to hide the bump already, given that this is my first pregnancy. But I guess with two, it's to be expected.

I've been wanting to start taking belly pix for a couple of weeks now since I started showing so early, but I didn't get around to it until last weekend. And then once I got the first picture taken, I got too lazy to actually post it. I'm debating whether to create a separate blog for these pictures so that I have them in one place-I would just do a website, but I'm not that tech savvy (unless one of my teki friends wants to give me some tips!). So for now I'll just start posting them here.

Here is the belly at 10w2d (last Saturday).


Spicy Sister said...

Hey Denise,

I am so sorry I have been so MIA! I am sucking at being a preggo buddy!

I am so sorry things have been so hard. It just sounds so demoralizing. I think you have full permission to whine away! I too, know the fear of complaining or whining after having tried so hard to get here - but pregnancy can be really hard at times, and I know that doesn't mean you appreciate it any less. Now maybe I won't feel so guilty when I do the same. Although I am totally in awe of your ability to work full time and go through all this without completely collapsing. Makes me feel like a whiny spoiled brat!

I am so so so glad you are getting at least a little relief. Funny, I am having those same cravings for sugary baked goods like donuts! But I can't have 'em....damn gluten! :( So please indulge in a few extra for me!

Also...I noticed you were showing a little when we met to see SATC! I thought your little bump was just so adorable!!! (I tried not to stare too much) I am just starting to get something resembling a bump, but most days I think it looks more like I am just getting more chubby.

It was so good seeing you and I think of you all the time! I am sending you so many good vibes for an end to the sickness very very soon!!!

Also, I get the fearful thing too. When I was at the OBs this week I was just *sure* they wouldn't be able to find a hb. I think all pg women feel fearful in the first trimester, but it is just so much greater for those of us who have gone through so much to get there. We are touched deeply with a sense of the fragility of it all that just doesn't go away. But I hope you will find comfort in knowing that your ms is probably a great sign that all is well and I will be cheering you on for a great OB appt next week where your fears can be relieved in the sounds of the galloping heartbeats of your two little buns.

Big hugs to you!!!

Io said...

Damn! That's $81 a day! Thank goodness for insurance doing something for once!
Your belly is looking good!

nancy said...

woohoo!!! Belly shots!!! yay!!!

And oh poo about how it sounds. My point was whining was okay in your case!

Shinejil said...

Glad at least donuts are sounding appetizing and that you're feeling better. I hope things continue to improve slowly.

Good luck on Wednesday! Keep us updated.

Kristina said...

I was showing at 10 weeks too! I should've known it was twins....

Rhonda said...

loved the belly shot!
I have very good techie friend (brother-in-law), so I will inquire about setting up a website and be in touch!!!
glad to hear about the magic ding dongs!


BB and MTB said...

So glad that you are feeling a little better, and I hope the progress continues! Great belly at 10w2d!!!!!!!!!!

Amy said...

How come there is only one baby in the widget?

Glad you are starting to feel better. It's got to be hard, to want to be pg so much, but then get so sick.

I LOVE belly shots!!

Rebecca said...

I showed at 8 look great! Congrats on the twins...can't wait to hear whatever makes you feel good!

hoping for a child said...

i guess i'm just a few weeks ahead of you...the morning sickness is killing me (it's evening sickness for me actually) but i've been too afraid to fill the prescription- i hate taking drugs. the heartburn is the worst. i just puked a few minutes ago (tmi?)my doctor told me today that even though i'm only at 12w5d i'm measuring 16 weeks since there are two. congrats on your bump! i'm told this horrible feeling should pass soon.