2 Heart Attacks

I received a phone call from the clinic at 10:30 this morning. My heart jumped into my throat. They aren't supposed to call the morning of the transfer unless the transfer has been cancelled because the embryos have arrested.

Me: Hello?!!!
Clinic: Is this Denise?
Me: Yes! Is something wrong, you're making me VERY nervous!
Clinic: No, everything's fine. Are you on your way? You are signed up for acupuncture at 10:00am!
Me: Uh, no. My transfer isn't until 2.
Clinic: Really. Well, we had to move some patients around and so the schedule got changed.
Me: But my transfer isn't until 2.
Clinic: Hang on one second...well, sorry about that. Obviously no one told you that they moved you up.
Me: Uh, no.
Clinic: Are you on your way?
Me: No, we weren't going to leave for another hour.
Clinic: Okay, no big deal. That's okay.
Me: We can leave now if you want us to.
Clinic: Sure. Go ahead and come in now.

Heart attack number 1 averted.

We got to the clinic and were told to go directly up to the surgery center and they would do the ultrasound and blood draw up there. We were called back almost immediately by the acupuncturist. She was all ready to get started and I had to tell her that I needed an ultrasound first. What's the point of paying $225 for acupuncture if they cancel the transfer? Luckily, the nurse had already given me the valium, so I got the benefit of that no matter what.

Two ultrasound techs came in to do an abdominal ultrasound to check for fluid. And there it was. My friend the fluid. Still hangin around. They thought it was slightly less than Saturday's level, but didn't sound too positive. I couldn't get a good read from them as to whether or not it was too much. One tried to calm my fears by saying that it really depended on how I was feeling and since I'm feeling pretty good today, we'll see. They left us alone for a bit and my mind was racing. All I kept thinking was "I'm NOT going to cry. NOT going to cry."

Next thing I know, the acupuncturist came back in to say the doctor had given us the go ahead. Phew!!! Second heart attack averted.

Dr. G was working today and did my transfer. Jen is right, he is awesome. He came in to go over the status of the lucky 13. We are amazed by our embryos. Out of the 13, 11 of them were graded 4AA, the highest grade our clinic gives. Dr. G said the embryologist who did the grading is quite conservative, so for 11 to be graded this high says a lot and he has never seen anyone have this many with the highest grade. He said he even double checked with the embryologist. How cool is that?

We talked about transferring 1 or 2 and decided on 2. Dr. G said our chances of success if we transfer 2 would be 75% versus 50% if we only transfer 1. Chances of twins for transferring 2 would be about 30%, so we were willing to risk those odds. Of course, these are just statistics and I don't think they really take into account my lining, our prior failures, or the quality of the embryos.

B asked if he was concerned about the fluid and Dr. G said he wasn't, that it was really just a sliver of fluid. That made me feel much better. He did tell me to keep up the fluid intake through the pregnancy test. Enough that I'm peeing every hour. He also encouraged me to continue with the sodium intake for another couple of days. Then we got down to business.

The embryologist came in and showed us our 2 embies on the screen. First time I ever got to see any of our embryos, so it was really cool! She said one was compacting and one was "pulsing." I asked her what pulsing meant and she said something like "first they compact and then they start expanding. I assume that's a good thing? Dr. G had a bit of trouble getting the catheter in and had to switch to a different one. I really don't understand why this stuff isn't in my chart. I mean I had multiple IUI's there where they had to switch catheters and two transfers, the first one being difficult as well. The last transfer went pretty smoothly and I think it is probably because it was the second one that Dr. S did and so he knew which catheter to use and how to thread it through my roller coaster of a cervix. Oh well. Dr. G managed after a bit and the embryos were transferred in. The embryologist checked the catheter and gave us the "all clear."

Another session of acupuncture and I had to remind them that they were supposed to draw blood. Things were pretty disorganized today. After the blood draw, we were on our way home.

The embryologist told us that they were freezing the other 9 4AA embryos today and they would check the other two tomorrow. One had already arrested and the other was about 24 hours behind where it should be, so it doesn't seem likely those two will make it freeze. But that's alright. We know we'll have at least 9 more buns in the freezer again! And this time we know they are really high quality.

Fluid Ramblings

Just getting ready for what I hope will be the big day tomorrow. I say "hope" because all of the sudden this afternoon I started panicking about the fluid build-up. Today at work was rough. Not having moved off the couch except to pee and move to the bed for 4 days straight, it was a bit of a shock to my system to be moving around all day and sitting upright in a chair. My abdomen was NOT happy. I felt even more bloated and started worrying that the fluid had returned with a vengeance. Of course now that I'm home relaxing on the couch, I don't think it is any different from yesterday.

It is just so hard to tell. Saturday when I thought it was getting worse, it was actually better. Therefore, because I feel better than I did Saturday, I now worry that it is actually worse. Faulty logic, I'm sure, but still.

I really, really hope we get to transfer tomorrow.

Lucky 13 Update

The Lucky 13 are still going strong! All 13 are still growing, which just amazes me. They like them to be 6-10 cells at this point. Eleven of them were 8 cells this morning (ten graded 4- and one graded 3+), and two were 7 cells (one graded 4- and one graded 3+). I'm not sure if 4+ is the top grade or just 4, but we're very pleased with the report. So we are definitely moving forward with a Day 5 transfer on Tuesday.

I'm very relieved. Although I feel much better today than I did a couple of days ago, I'm still not 100% and I'm grateful for 2 extra days to hopefully keep feeling better before the transfer. I'm still having some abdominal pain and my digestive system is NOT functioning at 100%. And although I'm still really bloated, I think the fluid has probably gone down quite a bit. I'm still waiting for a call from a nurse today with my instructions for Tuesday, but they will do an ultrasound before the transfer to check for fluid. I hope that by Tuesday, there is none left.

I am going to work tomorrow and I'm trying to figure out what the heck I can wear. None of my pants fit right now and everything is really uncomfortable except for very loose happy pants that have either elastic or a drawstring waste. I don't actually own any skirts or dresses-I just never wear them. Too bad I can't just work from home, but I really need to get some face time in, even if it is just one day. I'll be off Tuesday through Thursday and then back to work on Friday.

The snow disappeared pretty quickly yesterday and it was sunny by the afternoon. Today is sunny, but still a bit cool. It is supposed to be back in the 70's by tomorrow. Pretty typical spring weather in this part of the world.

Fluid Movement

Just got back from yet another ultrasound and there is actually less fluid than yesterday. Yay!!! I am relieved, but left wondering why I feel worse than I did yesterday morning. Rhonda's comment on my last post made me think that maybe there is some truth in feeling funky from eating a weird diet. I mean, how often if life are you told to eat as much sodium as possible? It can't be all that good for the digestive tract. The nurse encouraged me to just keep up the fluids and to rest, lay low and watch movies all day. And to call if I notice any changes.

For today's diet, I'm adding chicken bullion cubes. One cube dissolved in one cup of water has a whopping 1,100mg of sodium. That was my breakfast this morning on the way to the clinic. B is going to a basketball game today, so mom and dad are coming over to keep me company and deal with the dogs. Mom is going to make some yummy, salty potato latkes for dinner that we were supposed to have for passover, but had to skip because she had a cold and didn't want to give it to any of us. I'm also adding benefiber to my diet today in hopes that it will keep me more regular. If this stuff works, it will be pretty amazing. It is a tasteless fiber powder that you can dissolve in any liquid or soft food and you don't taste it. At all. The pharmacist assured me it works well.

On the way home from the clinic, it started snowing. That's right, folks. April 26th and it is snowing. Big, fat, furious flakes. I tried to capture it on film, but you can't really tell and I didn't have the patience to play around with the camera settings. So those white things on the table that look like cotton, those are big ole flakes of spring snow.

Fluid Fiasco

When I met with the nurse yesterday morning, I was given strict instructions to call if I started to feel any worse (difficulty breathing, moving, pain, nausea). I readily agreed and went home to rest, drink and eat. About mid-day I started feeling not so great and laid down to take a nap. I felt a little better after that, but started to feel worse by the time evening rolled around. My stomach felt so tight from the fluid that it was a little difficult to stand up straight. I wasn't sure if it was my imagination, but it seemed like it was a little more difficult to breathe. The dilemma I was having was that if I called at night, the on call nurse would make me go to the emergency room. And it didn't feel like an emergency to me. So I went to bed.

I actually slept pretty good, aside from getting up every 2 hours to pee. And I felt better. No breathing problems, no problem standing up straight. This morning when I woke up, my stomach hurt. I think it probably has to do with my digestive system trying to move things through when there is very little room because of the excess fluid. Fluid pressing on different parts of my body = pain. Unfortunately I haven't been able to remedy that situation yet this morning, despite the stool softeners. I have resigned myself to calling the clinic today and likely going in for another ultrasound, but I don't want to make the call until this one issue is resolved. And I can't do anything to help it resolve faster.

Yesterday, in addition to much vitamin water and regular water, I ate the following salty foods: beef jerky, pickles, peanut butter, gardettos bread chips, frozen pizza, beef stew, processed cheese spread on wheat thins. Every single thing I ate had sodium and I must have drank my weight in vitamin water. If that isn't going to help the fluid situation resolve, I don't know what will. I am really hoping they don't call me for a day 3 transfer tomorrow, because I really think they will cancel me if that is the case. I need the extra two days to get rid of this fluid. I hope.